Thursday, August 30, 2007

Tap Dance!!!!

Its that feeling again
that short step
that graceful recovery
that fall from grace

that knowing feeling
that distant echo
of having gone through it all before
that free fall

hold on.
ave that beauty
to step out of that thick casket
to stop the rot

that one big joke
everyone takes refuge in
To be laughed at
mocked at
till that very concept of self
dissolves in the joy
of being the joker

that cave to hide in
that person to become
those people to love
them feelings to despise



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Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Homeward Bound!!!!

August 11th
Me landed home after a 2 month break. Home began to feel less like home. It's begun to feel more like an obligation.

I was invited for the TeK Music inaugarals, the club I headed in my final year in college.

I left that night knowing for sure..., I never belonged there. but the memories will forever remain. Of all those midnight practice sessions. Of waking up at 6 with the bass line buzzing in my head, taking a quick shower only to head straight to F-301, to pick my bass guitar, switch on the tape and play to the song.

I must confess, I never felt part of the group. Now after XL, after knowing all the possibilities. I know I'll never get back. Definitely no, not for the music. but like i said, for the friends....

I was dying to get back to Bangalore..... to home. I'm beginning to love the freedom. It may come in the form of a sprouted Aloo lying in the vegetable tray in the kitchen ...but yeah....its...

"that little place called Neverland .... where the world around you ceases to exist......wheres its just you and your dreams...."

So like i was saying .. back to job descriptions.


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Thursday, August 09, 2007

Now this is song writing...

Sarah Mclachlan - I will remember you
***********************************************************

I will remember you,
will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Remember the good times that we had?
I let them slip away from us when things got bad
How clearly I first
saw you smilin' in the sun
Wanna feel your warmth upon me
I wanna be the one

I'm so tired but I can't sleep
Standin' on the edge of something much too deep
It's funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word
We are screaming inside
But we can't be heard

I'm so afraid to love you
But more afraid to lose
Clinging to a past that doesn't let me choose
Once there was a darkness
Deep and endless night
You gave me everything you had
Oh you gave me light

And I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don't let your life pass you by
Weep not for
the memories


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Wednesday, August 08, 2007

August 5th



9:33:36 AM

Finished checking my mail. About to check my new pair of earphones. Creative EP 630. Its all about Noise cancellation.

7:27 AM

Finished a round of foosball. Lost both games. Looking forward to a day of job descriptions for my client. Now how can I make it “fun”???

12:29 PM Melancholies
Do not mistake my reticence for ignorance.
I only wish to help. I might seem distant at first, but am hoping to bring us a lot closer. Forgive me for the tears I planted on your cheeks. The time is now,to come to terms with my own incongruence, to make decisions.
I should have long realised that it was just a silly masquerade in my own private world. I should have realised that the clothes I donned were to be shed sooner or later. Each time, I have detained the anguish for later, out of sheer fear. No more. These things are never supposed to be secret, Things to be loudly acclaimed. This two-faced dialogue with myself is drowning me. Pangs of jealousy, of sheer loss will always abound. It is hard to quell dreams I have fleshed myself, but I know I can change them. I am happy though that you deserve each other. If I nurtured the love, so be it.
We will get back in touch. For now, we need to go different ways. We each deserve the right to remember the world when each other never existed. Take in the new panorama. I have tried and trust me it is not that bad.
Hope, I will gratify myself with the hope of finding someone better. Probably she is just round the corner. It is not that hard to dream. And for now, my dreams keep me company. Reaching out to the world that I live in, but that I know does not exist.
Like Mr Fenn says, “You can learn to love almost anybody. All it takes is the decision!”

But yeah, you do not know what you got till it’s gone.

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